It's been days. These days have been going by so fast, with nothing good happening.

On Tuesday I felt like I ate a lot, had half a Delicio pizza, so I went to sleep and slept till 9pm.

For the past two days all I've eatten is two strawberries and a cheese string. I'll probably eat tonight. I've been feeling really dizzy, like my whole world is moving, and spinning. And I've been getting really bad headaches. I have no energy, always exhausted, tired. And my stomach hurts. I don't know how I wake up and move on with my days. I don't understand.

Ugh.

And I've been moving, so I don't know exactly where my scale is. I haven't weighted myself since the weekend.

TUESDAY: 148.5lbs.

WEDNESDAY: 145.5lbs.

TODAY: 143lbs.

This is how I've been doing it. All day I'll only just liquids, which is usually coffee and water. Then I'll have dinner. Only one meal a day.

I feel weak and exhausted. I don't know if this is why, but it's working. And I haven't smoked pot since Sunday, so I haven't had the urge to binge.

I'll feel good about it once I see change.

I ate a lot again yesterday.

I hope not to check the scales for about two or three days.

So I might not post till then. See where I end up.

I need control.

Yesterday I woke up at 138.5lbs, then ruined it yesterday by eatting a lot more then I usually do. Today I woke up at

CW: 143lbs.

So if I don't eat much today, I should be able to at least be at 141lbs. by tomorrow morning I hope.

I kind of let myself down, but I still have time to do this. I'm surprised at myself anyway.

"I don't care if it hurts.

I wanna have control.

I wanna perfect body.

I wanna pefect soul." 

Yesterday morning: 142.5lbs.

This morning: 140.5lbs.

<3

INTAKE
m: Coffee.
l: Coffee.
s: Cream egg (180 cal.), Carmel egg (190 cal.) < so delicious.
d: Soup (110 cal.)
TOTAL: 480 calories.

And I went for a walk. I think that's why I lost 2 pounds. I walked a lot yesterday. It was really nice.